Liverpool issue player recall

Liverpool FC have ordered the recall of a slew of faulty products following tests which show potentially dangerous faults.

Among the affected products are the David N’Gog, a newly-released product which Liverpool said was unable to take any sort of load-bearing pressure.

The Jamie Carragher may also need to be called in over concerns over rustiness while it is feared the Ryan Babel is likely to lose control at high speed.

Customers have voiced concerns that the Rafa Benitez model is too confusing and cryptic while claiming the Maxi Rodriguez is ‘too easy to lose sight of’.

An LFC spokesman said: “We are sorry for these mistakes and we hope customers are patient while we rectify them. We expect it should take around 103 years.”

Meanwhile Rafa Benitez has slated Blackburn’s style after his side won an ill tempered game at Anfield.

He said: “I think the fans, they wear trousers that may have been stolen..from the 80s. They show no class, everybody knows it is time to get the spring fashions going but they still come in winter macs. That is very bad style.”